Happy Finals everyone. As we approach our impending doom, let us all take a moment to publicly acknowledge that we hope there's a curve....and that we're at the top of it and everyone else is at the bottom.
We all know the result of this week, death. (You thought I was going to say grades huh? No it's death, it doesn't matter if you pass or fail after a week of exams you're dead) It started the weekend before (Not for me mom, I started studying last month) putting together study guides and finishing projects. Sunday night finally rolled around and you're first exam was in the morning. You thought, I'll be done studying by nine! Well it reaches a certain point where you realize it's just not going to happen, so you give up, get a snack and keep plugging. (A healthy snack of course, unless you're me, in that case you literally start chugging chocolate milk and popping buncha crunch) Now, here are some of the necessaries and rituals of studying every college student MUST preform in order to study well.
1. Check Facebook, you never know what could be happening in the world or if somebody just got engaged or something. (Side note on this one, you should check it every five minutes because obviously things change fast)
2. After checking your Facebook, locate your comfy clothes and put these on. Obviously you need to be extremely comfortable while studying.
3. Snacks and beverages! You really don't know how long you'll be sitting here, best be prepared with proper sustenance and hydration in case it's a really long time.
4. Check your email, you probably should've checked this first if you were checking anything because this is where the actual important stuff is. At this point we're all stalling.
5. Check Facebook....again... just in case.
6. Pandora station, gotta make sure to get that study groove on.
7. Prepare your work area and stare at your book a bit. I mean, what's the meaning of life? Why think about math, biology, or marketing just yet? We should be pondering the deeper meanings of the universe at this point obviously.
8. Check Facebook, read every article you come across while on too. Gotta make sure we're educated.
9. Actually start studying. Once you get here you should be fine for about another thirty minutes before you need to check Facebook again.
Finals part 2
So great! You've spent the night studying, congratulations, now it's test time. This is generally how I feel about tests and test taking.
1. "Ohnononononononononononononono" (sometimes an expletive but I would get in trouble if I wrote any of that here. Yes by my mother, whom by the way is super cool.)
2. "Alright Em, you got this, you totally got this. You studied and everything. You've got this"
3. "What is this? Chinese?"
4. "This isn't good. Nope, this is bad. Badbadbadbadbad."
5. "This isn't so bad, I know what I'm talking about."
6. "Just kidding I have no idea what I'm talking about."
7. "True or False, fifty/fifty shot, the last three have been true.... alright it's gotta be false"
8. "What is the professor even thinking? He just stands there. Staring at us. Probably deciding who he should just fail right now"
9. "Almost done, check your answers." "I don't want to" "Stop arguing with yourself and do it."
10. "DONE"
11. "That person did not have the same pattern of answers I did on my bubble sheet."
12. "Please say I didn't fail. Pleasepleaseplease?"
So no worries if you freak a little about finals, I'm on your side. But we've got this, a few more long nights and a few hours of testing it'll be great. Just great. I'll be waiting for you all in a corner, crying. What? No. Sorry holding our heads high in victory. Persevere comrades.
Much love,
Em
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